Ahh Hefeweizen; sweet, often delicious, unfiltered wheat beer…
So I was picking up a 30 rack of some cheap domestic pee in a can the other day (not for me, I promise!) and I thought I may as well get something I haven’t had before to keep this whole blog thing going. As you may have surmised by the title of this post, today’s beer will be a hefeweizen by Widmer. This is my first introduction to Widmer Brothers beers and I have to say, I’m a little underwhelmed. This one smells a bit on the yeasty side of things but still has the slight hint of the sweetness I often associate with wheat beers. The murky amber coloring promises a beer full of flavor and beckons me to drink deeply of it’s rich flavors…
Don’t let these things fool you though! Any pleasantries in this experience stop short of taste. It may be my allergies, but I honestly can’t really taste much of anything in here. I mean I’m aware that I’m drinking something which appears to be beer, but it tastes more like tainted water from a village well. Really, thats it. I mean its not terrible, it probably doesn’t have plague, and I’d much rather play a round of pong with this in my cup as opposed to the usual suspects, though since its only sold in 6 packs I don’t think its gonna fly for that.
My advice to the Widmere Bros: New marketing campaign and packaging aimed at making Widmere Hefeweizen the new beer of choice for beirut/pong tournaments.
So for this future tournament accesory, I’ll give it a halfway respectable 4
Once again I have decided to resurrect my forgotten blog of neglect. I’ll spare you the apologies and empty promises of past posts and get right into it…
I thought long and hard about my selection for said blog resurrection and concluded that this was an occasion of celebration and rejoicing. And ‘what is the obligatory drink of celebration’ I asked myself, to which I promptly replied ‘champagne of course!’. Since this is a beer blog, why not review the “Champagne of Beers”? And this is how it comes to pass that I am sitting at my computer at 2:30 on a Monday afternoon, defiling myself with Miller High Life.
I often wonder what leads to the popularity of beers such as this… does one find themselves at a particular drinking establishment and think; I wish there were some way I could drink my own piss in public and not be shunned by society? I mean honestly, does anyone actually enjoy the flavor of this stuff? I can’t for the life of me think of a good reason people might drink it. Kudos to the marketing department over at Miller, they’re obviously worth every penny!
So when one actually takes the time to examine the flavor of this “champagne of beers”, I can’t help but think it tastes like a skunked Pabst. I’ve experimented a little (very little) with home brewing, and I think if I created something that tasted like this, I would conclude that I forgot to sterilize something before fermenting, possibly spilled some detergent into the mix, or maybe the fermenting keg just wasn’t sealed properly… either way I’d call it a wash and dump it all. But I guess when you’ve got a few thousand kegs of the stuff and a great marketing department you can actually get people to pay for your mistakes. So if you’ve got fewer than 15 teeth, 85 cents and a cousin to cuddle up with, then flip on some nascar and grab yourself some High Life! Which, by the way, scores a 1 on my sliding scale of arbitrary judgement.
Once again I find my shameful absence necessitating an apology, and accordingly; I am deeply sorry for my lack of drinking of late… but today is not a day to dwell on our shortcomings! Today is a day of celebration! Thats right, its again time to celebrate prohibition repealment day! In the future I have to remember to schedule a proper shindig for such an occasion, which is why Outlook is now scheduled to remind me of this wondrous holiday a week in advance next year.
So for my second return (its at least my second), I have chosen Murphy’s Stout. You may find yourself pointing out that Murphy’s stout is imported from the UK, making me some kind of UKanadian… to this I reply there’s no such thing as a “UKanadian” you geographically impaired ignoramus, so your point is moot. Also I was reminded of prohibition repealment day by my good friend Baida (no that’s not his real name, stop making dumb comments) and did not have enough time to go to the liqueur store to get a proper domestic brew, so what was in the fridge is what is on my blog (ironically this was also left in my fridge by Baida).
And on to the beer! This wonderfully velvety black stout looks very much like Guinness once decanted (although not as entertaining while doing so) and also benefits from a nitrogen widget in it’s draught can. I find myself gravitating more and more towards these draught cans as they tend to house the creamiest and least carbonated beverages around, which are both traits I value pretty highly in a beer. Flavor wise, I’m struck by an overall mild kind of caramely smokiness when tasting this one. In fact, I’m actually quite taken aback by the mildness of this stout, considering its murky qualities which I typically attribute to quite strong beverages.
Wow so the more I drink this one, the more I have to say this is going on my favorites list. I’m not really sure there’s anything here I don’t like… The creamy texture is fabulous, the mild flavor just entices me to drink more…
So really any further description isn’t going to do this one justice. You need to go out and buy a four pack of these silken stouts and see for yourself what I mean!
Yup, so this one gets a 9.5
